Apologies, why?

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How many times do you think you need that apology, you get it and yet the behaviour continues?
This is often a theme in a therapy sessions, where a client cannot get past the hurt they are feeling until they get that apology from their loved one, their friend or their colleagues. However, then the behaviour continues, maybe the same, maybe slightly different.
Where are you now? Where are they? After all they have apologised for what you asked for.
Sometimes the only way, is for you to change your behaviour and in that they can learn to change theirs.
We cannot expect others to change, to learn or to grow, only you can do that.
How much is that apology really worth?

Top trump problems vs unconditional listening.

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Who feels like they are wanting to talk about their problems yet find they are always being top trumped by somebody?

Why does this happen, when all you needed was somebody to really listen. So where do you find the right person?

Maybe this has been going through your thoughts?

Have you been considering going to your GP to ask for some help?

Are you feeling out of sorts and just don’t know why? Or maybe you do know why!

First of all do you have that somebody to talk to? When I say talk to, I mean somebody who you can really talk openly to, who will listen to you, without interruption, nonjudgemental and not go on about their issues.

Sometimes our friends and family without even knowing can give you their problem just when you don’t need it. When you need empathy, to be held in strength, whilst you talk openly to explore your emotions and feel your pain. Whilst a friend may offer you sympathy, this may be OK until your friend feels sorry for you. After all how can they feel your pain? For some individuals they may like this however it is non productive.

Remember this is not a game of top trumps. These are your emotions and you are allowed to talk about them.

You don’t have to compete to find our who has the worst problem.

Does it feel that way sometimes?

Is it time to consider counselling? When you enter your counselling initial session you will notice the counselling relationship, you may notice the difference. The counsellor is there for you. This is your time, a time and space for you to be open, to talk about you unconditionally in a confidential setting.

It may be the right time for you to be listened to.

Click here to find out more.

Battles

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Throughout life each and every one of us will face some kind of a battle, whether this is big or small, facing a loss, an illness, a breakup, trauma or work issues. It could be family or friendship battles or battles with your neighbours. Whatever this is, this battle to you is your own personal battle.

Are you living in a battle zone right now or do you feel that you are busy picking up the pieces?

Think about what is going on around you.

Who’s in battle right now? Is this you? Or are you watching a battle with family or friends.

Do you feel judged by the choices that you are making? Unable to take control? Struggling to decide what is right or wrong?

When you are in that battle zone with advise being thrown from all areas, what do you do? Who do you listen to?

It’s easy just to put your head down in the sand and wait until the all clear. Some may want to go full force and battle every corner come what may, and look back on the injured parties later. Then what. Is it too late either way?

Living in that battleground, protecting yourself is hard if you are feeling the judgment, the ‘haven’t you got over it yet, the lack of support or the ‘told you so’s’.

We all need some support, encouragment and a listening ear. But are family and friends often too close? Would an impartial ear help? Somebody you can trust, have confidence in and know they won’t judge you know matter what you tell them.

How does judging help a person? Because deep down we know it doesn’t but we all do it, don’t we? After all, we all need to make choices in our lives which can be tricky, testing and hard for us. Which for others may seem easy.

So outside looking in, the judgement begins, the shoulda, woulda, coulda.

When all that person needs is somebody to listen.

They have their own internal battle, they don’t need other people to help join in.

Independent support offers you a confidential place to talk openly about anything, somewhere you will not feel judged and a place you may find resolution.

Counselling at counselme.

Going live

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So today I will be going on air!!!

No not flying through the sky, I will be speaking on the radio (or trying to).

Last week I was contacted out of the blue by Radio Leicester, I was asked if I would like to have a chat about a blog post I had previously written on my webpage.

Yes me, Subconscious Healing.

So today at around 9am I will be on Radio Leicester.

I will be talking about my post, Spring cleaning.

A little spring cleaning.

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Who’s ready for Spring?

The spring season is really here, the brighter nights are coming, believe it or not we will soon be changing the clocks and the spring flowers are starting to arrive. But we seem to be missing the important weather that we are so very used to. We keep having snow, rain, and freezing winds which is some what annoying! Well it is for Subconscious Healing and our beagle walks!

So we need to ensure that this weather does not make us feel negative, low or sad. These feelings could stop you wanting to do what you would normally want to do in the spring because it has dragged on for what seems to be such a long time.

So we need to make a change!!

Today was my change day! I decided it was my spring clean day! On went the music and out came the cleaning spray. Whilst I was enjoying this therapeutic cleaning, I was scrubbing away, singing and dancing away my winter blues, some of the beast from the east chills and also having a real warm up. It motivated me to think of some of the plans that I would like to achieve, it also allowed me to close a few doors and gave me a chance to move forward on a clean pathway.

I wonder what would help motivate you to move forward whilst the cold is still carrying on?

What do you feel a need to clear away? What would help to get you motivated? It is scary the amount of unnecessary stress and emotion that our bodie’s seem to hold. Start a clean slate for spring and summer! Visit counselme for more information.